Birthday Girl

Do you ever have that constant influence in your life whispering in your ear – sitting on the good angel side of your shoulder – endlessly pushing you harder than you’ve been pushed, accepting your faults, but knowing your strengths sometimes when you can’t see them through the fogged windshield of life…

I have been blessed beyond measure for not only the things I have in my life, but moreso for all the people I have – I have a group of friends that has set an unprecedented bar to which people I’ve met along the journey of life can’t hold a flame to – I used to get discouraged that I wasn’t finding large groups of friends in college, or at new work place settings, but then I came to the full circle realization to the truth of the whole matter…see my friends have such a high standard they set for themselves and the company they keep – that the bar we have in tact for friendship is one that keeps our perception and perspective of who we want in our lives in clear sight.

Auntie Mawri, as we’ve appropriately coined the nickname, has been my saint my savior and my guiding light since we became friends, I can’t tell you when or where our friendship began – but I can’t think of a day I haven’t been glad it did. With the wisest of words and the purest of hearts, you have guided me through a large portion of life’s bumpy roads – you’ve always been a guiding light and a warm hug when I needed one. Having the ability to listen to me not just hear and hurt when I hurt is the most beautiful thing about you – I have held other friends to a standard you have set for my life, I can honestly say over half of them couldn’t obtain it – I’m not upset, I smile knowing you’re not only one of a kind – but the character and integrity of your being is pure gold, and to me that’s worth more than any silver spare change character I’ve found in others that have walked out quicker than they walked in.

Through life’s bends and curves – you’ve taught me when to fight and when to swerve, I can’t thank you enough for your endless presence in my life and the amount of inspiration you bring to the table for me. Watching you board a plane with a one way destination to California was one of the hardest things for all of us…we secretly knew you were going to do bigger things than any of us could have ever imagined…thanks for proving us right. We’ve always said that our unique ability to adapt to any environment has truly kept us all best friends for longer than anyone else would have expected – but for that I’m grateful. Visiting you this past summer I noted on the punctual fact that no matter how many the miles, oceans, bi ways, highways, and divides – there’s never a space great enough, or a place small enough to keep us from each other – our friendship knows no lengths, most strengths, and a love that I haven’t found anywhere else…

On this big day birthday girl I hope your wildest dreams come true – because you deserve that much 10 fold – thank you for giving me the present of your presence everyday of my life. We need more people like you in this world – thanks for making it a wonderful place, Happy Birthday Auntie Mawri….Love – Auntie Mayden.

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Give Me Until Then To Give Up This Fight

I’ve come across the inclination that although this whole time i’ve thought it was your fault for everything that’s transpired and how you’re the one changing – I’ve come to a standstill with my thoughts and grievences, you know what’s more important than all of it – I love you.

I love the you I know, the one that would always be there for me, and the one that was always helping me more than herself. That you isn’t here anymore – and that’s ok because people do change. The guilt I feel right now about our fight is just built up because I feel sad not being able to just call you when I want to or need to – if I called to say sorry because I felt guilty, i’d still have the same issues as before so I can’t do that and I hope you understand that.

Although the you I once knew isn’t around anymore if you get the chance can you tell her I miss her? I haven’t fully put the responsibility and blame on you though because I’ve come to the full circle realization that maybe I never even really knew you at all. I knew you as you – but with someone else added to the equation?  I wasn’t all to familiar with who that person was and maybe that’s the half of this, and maybe it’s not – but what I did know and what I did have as a best friend however much or little of that was actually you…is actually spectacular – so don’t you go losing yourself in success that you find yourself in failure.

I wish you all life’s happiness’ and triumphs – I’m sorry I couldn’t stay around to be a part of them with you – the you I once knew. If she ever shows up again tell her to give me a call – we need to catch up.